Itisrai.ning prosperity. It is pouring abundance. It is raining blessings.
Evolution in process.
What an extraordinary time this last six months has been. A time when quite an array of cobwebs and cracks have seemingly emerged from within me, to be observed and dealt with as and when! The catalyst has been the sudden departure to Nivana of my dearest friend and spouse of 47 years (together for 49) took me by surprise, and I am learning and growing anew!
So much to say, to re-look at, to value, to be so very grateful for, to laugh about, and also times to acknowledge as painful learning experiences due to the resistances within us both!
I am learning, learning, learning about aspects of myself, probably more than I have ever done so before. I am so grateful to him for making space for this 'alone' time. It is allowing me to really experience the black hole of nothingness that has not had the chance to be really explored and felt until now.
Time, to even find the bleak, blackness that I knew lay somewhere in the caverns of my unconscious, let alone explore!
Now, I have been honoured with that time and through this 'one person space' I have hour by hour, day by day, week by week silently walked and been lead to the bleak, blackness of a hole.
Silence and time are perfect companions that allow the senses to explore. Allow the senses to feel. Allowed me to submerge into the blackness, into the perceived bleakness and just 'be'. It has been, and to a degree still is a blessed time of awakening to the very substance of creativity, a 'me' merged with 'silence' and 'time'. Pure awareness of the 'me vibration' of my essence clocked by swaths of mists that came and went like undulating seaweed - covering and revealing as the undercurrent dictated.
As I have silently observed this play of 'feelings of my mind' that overlayed my 'me' essence, so I have come to learn and know more of these whimsical dancing shadows. Come to open my ears to their voices, and my heart to their feelings. A melding of the colours of terror and love bring a soft mellowness of compassion. From the gently colours of compassion new strength and courage emerges. I observe and feel an extraordinary alchemy taking place within.
I cannot hasten it. 'I' have to nurture and kindle the patience, (that is the gift of compassion, and the creator of friendship) and as 'I' do so, I am aware of the intangible birth taking place. A new form emerging - evolution in process ..
What a magnificent gift Colin has given me.
So much to say, to re-look at, to value, to be so very grateful for, to laugh about, and also times to acknowledge as painful learning experiences due to the resistances within us both!
I am learning, learning, learning about aspects of myself, probably more than I have ever done so before. I am so grateful to him for making space for this 'alone' time. It is allowing me to really experience the black hole of nothingness that has not had the chance to be really explored and felt until now.
Time, to even find the bleak, blackness that I knew lay somewhere in the caverns of my unconscious, let alone explore!
Now, I have been honoured with that time and through this 'one person space' I have hour by hour, day by day, week by week silently walked and been lead to the bleak, blackness of a hole.
Silence and time are perfect companions that allow the senses to explore. Allow the senses to feel. Allowed me to submerge into the blackness, into the perceived bleakness and just 'be'. It has been, and to a degree still is a blessed time of awakening to the very substance of creativity, a 'me' merged with 'silence' and 'time'. Pure awareness of the 'me vibration' of my essence clocked by swaths of mists that came and went like undulating seaweed - covering and revealing as the undercurrent dictated.
As I have silently observed this play of 'feelings of my mind' that overlayed my 'me' essence, so I have come to learn and know more of these whimsical dancing shadows. Come to open my ears to their voices, and my heart to their feelings. A melding of the colours of terror and love bring a soft mellowness of compassion. From the gently colours of compassion new strength and courage emerges. I observe and feel an extraordinary alchemy taking place within.
I cannot hasten it. 'I' have to nurture and kindle the patience, (that is the gift of compassion, and the creator of friendship) and as 'I' do so, I am aware of the intangible birth taking place. A new form emerging - evolution in process ..
What a magnificent gift Colin has given me.
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